Regulate Like a Pro: The Two Big Ways to Deal with Test Anxiety and School Stress

Test anxiety. That pit in your stomach. The racing thoughts. The sudden urge to escape to the bathroom and never return.

Whether it’s a pop quiz, a presentation, or just navigating school social life, many students feel anxiety but don’t always know what to do with it.

Here’s the good news: there are only two main ways to regulate your emotions. And the even better news? You can start practicing both right now.

We call them:

1. The Body

2. The Story

🎯 Real Talk: Jordan’s Story

Jordan always froze during math tests. His heart raced, his mind went blank. After trying the 5-Second Reset and a power phrase—“I just need to begin”—he didn’t ace the next quiz, but he finished it without panicking.

🔹 THE BODY: REGULATING FROM THE OUTSIDE IN

Your body reacts before your brain catches up. That sweaty-palms, fast-heartbeat, tunnel-vision feeling? That’s your nervous system shifting into high-alert mode.

Instead of avoiding those feelings, try working with your body first. These quick tools are easy to use anywhere:

3 Fast Somatic Tools:

1. 5-Second Reset

One hand on your heart, one on your belly.
Breathe in for 5, hold for 5, out for 7.
Repeat 3 times. This signals safety to your nervous system.

2. Grounding Your Senses

Look around and name:

• 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can touch

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste

This gets you out of spinning thoughts and back into your body.

3. Shake It Out

Stand up. Shake your arms, legs, and head.
Animals do this after stress. You can too.

🔹 THE STORY: REGULATING FROM THE INSIDE OUT

The second part of regulation is the story you’re telling yourself—about the test, the situation, yourself.

Negative thoughts can make anxiety spiral:

• “I’m going to fail.”

• “Everyone’s watching me mess up.”

• “I always screw this up.”

But here’s the truth: you can shift the story. Here’s how.

3 Mindset Shifts:

1. Catch the Catastrophe

When you think: “I’ll never be good at this,” pause.
Ask: Is this true? Always?
Replace with: “This is hard right now, but I can learn.”

2. Flip the Frame

Switch: “I’m so bad at this” to
“This is a chance to practice staying calm when it’s hard.”
You’re not failing. You’re training.

3. Power Phrase

Have one you can repeat in stressful moments:

• “One step at a time.”

• “Breathe. Begin. Be here.”

• “I’ve done hard things before.”

Anchor to it like a mantra. Let it guide you back.

✅ Try This:

Next time you feel the anxiety rising:

• Choose one body tool.

• Choose one story shift.

• Practice for 5 minutes.

• Notice the change.

💡 Did You Know?

Students who practice emotional regulation show:

• Higher academic performance

• Better memory recall

• Increased resilience in social situations
  (Source: CASEL, Harvard MindBrainEd, APA)

🧠 For Grown-Ups

Parents and educators:
When your student is stuck in stress, try asking:

• “What does your body need right now?”

• “What story are you telling yourself?”

Then listen. No rescuing needed. Just presence.

🏷️ Language to Take With You:

• The Body and The Story → your two main regulation levers

• Flip the Frame → turn anxiety into a growth moment

• Power Phrase → your personal emotional anchor

• #RegulateToRelate → use it as a reminder

💬 What About You?

Which tool do you use more when you’re stressed—body tools or story tools?
What’s your personal power phrase?

Tell us in the comments or share your favorite tip with someone who needs it.
Tag us with #BodyAndStory or #RegulateToRelate when you use these in real life.

Want more tools like this for your student or child?
Check out our Executive Function Coaching programs at Beacon Pathways Education Consulting.
We help students develop calm, clarity, and confidence—without shame or overwhelm.